NO WONDER I’ve had giant blooms all over my garden this summer – until the builder’s rubble obscured much of it, that is. Turns out it was probably all that heavy metal music I was pumping out earlier this year during a purge (aka : a move from one place to another) of my old vinyl and CD collection.
Growing up, I was told that classical music played to plants made them flourish. Heavy metal made them shrivel up and die – proof, if any was needed, that my growing taste for heavy rock was sent from the devil, and just as deadly. No matter that I hadn’t abandoned Bach and Beethoven, or that show tunes still made my heart soar. My eclecticism was not considered. I was to stay well away from sizzling guitar licks lest my immortal soul was scorched, too.
Not a chance, if UK gardening guru Chris Beardshaw is to be believed. Those lascivious licks are very good for plants (I bet they’d have made a teen me blossom, too).
Talking on BBC Radio 4 last week, which was playing through my PC speakers as I worked, Chris said plants bombarded with the “great, thumping, rowdy sounds of Black Sabbath” flourished in a controlled test.
One of his horticultural students wanted to write a dissertation on the effects of music on plants, so four glass houses full of alstroemerias – Inca lilies – were set up. In the control house, which was silent, they grew normally; the classically serenaded lilies were fairly floriferous; while the heavy metal-saturated ones “had the best flowers and the best resistance to pest and disease”.
In the fourth glass house, their exposure to the pretty pop sounds of Cliff Richard was, he said, disastrous: “They all died!”
Interest piqued, I searched for info on the long-ago research responsible for the censorship imposed upon my teen listening. I found it on THCFarmer, a seriously authoritative agricultural website – or so I thought.
It had been the work of one Dorothy Retallack, who determined plants responded well to frequencies administered in the form of compositions by Bach, Haydn, Beethoven, and other 18th and 19th century European composers, played intermittently for several hours a day. “Retallack also experimented with various types of rock music to see what effects they would have on plant growth,” reported THCFarmer. “Plants ‘listening’ to selections from Led Zeppelin, Vanilla Fudge, and Jimi Hendrix became stunted or gangly ... some bending away from the sound source. After 16 days, most died …. So everyone! Better go rig up some surround- sound and play some Mozart …! ”
There was something else on THCFarmer’s page, too – a strap at the top. “Medical Marijuana Seeds,” it said.
What an odd advert, I thought.
Clicking on the site’s “About” page, the mist of the odd message suddenly cleared: “THCFarmer is a unique place to discover new strains of Marijuana,” it declares. “We offer exciting possibilities for both Marijuana growers and breeders alike.” This latest news, then, is sure to have them all a-giggle.
Years ago a musician friend of mine insisted the “experts” were all wrong and that heavy metal was the secret to the success of his own crops. I never took much notice – after all, he only grew “pot” plants.
It’s music to my ears
Growing up, I was told that classical music played to plants made them flourish. Heavy metal made them shrivel up and die – proof, if any was needed, that my growing taste for heavy rock was sent from the devil, and just as deadly. No matter that I hadn’t abandoned Bach and Beethoven, or that show tunes still made my heart soar. My eclecticism was not considered. I was to stay well away from sizzling guitar licks lest my immortal soul was scorched, too.
Not a chance, if UK gardening guru Chris Beardshaw is to be believed. Those lascivious licks are very good for plants (I bet they’d have made a teen me blossom, too).
Talking on BBC Radio 4 last week, which was playing through my PC speakers as I worked, Chris said plants bombarded with the “great, thumping, rowdy sounds of Black Sabbath” flourished in a controlled test.
One of his horticultural students wanted to write a dissertation on the effects of music on plants, so four glass houses full of alstroemerias – Inca lilies – were set up. In the control house, which was silent, they grew normally; the classically serenaded lilies were fairly floriferous; while the heavy metal-saturated ones “had the best flowers and the best resistance to pest and disease”.
In the fourth glass house, their exposure to the pretty pop sounds of Cliff Richard was, he said, disastrous: “They all died!”
Interest piqued, I searched for info on the long-ago research responsible for the censorship imposed upon my teen listening. I found it on THCFarmer, a seriously authoritative agricultural website – or so I thought.
It had been the work of one Dorothy Retallack, who determined plants responded well to frequencies administered in the form of compositions by Bach, Haydn, Beethoven, and other 18th and 19th century European composers, played intermittently for several hours a day. “Retallack also experimented with various types of rock music to see what effects they would have on plant growth,” reported THCFarmer. “Plants ‘listening’ to selections from Led Zeppelin, Vanilla Fudge, and Jimi Hendrix became stunted or gangly ... some bending away from the sound source. After 16 days, most died …. So everyone! Better go rig up some surround- sound and play some Mozart …! ”
There was something else on THCFarmer’s page, too – a strap at the top. “Medical Marijuana Seeds,” it said.
What an odd advert, I thought.
Clicking on the site’s “About” page, the mist of the odd message suddenly cleared: “THCFarmer is a unique place to discover new strains of Marijuana,” it declares. “We offer exciting possibilities for both Marijuana growers and breeders alike.” This latest news, then, is sure to have them all a-giggle.
Years ago a musician friend of mine insisted the “experts” were all wrong and that heavy metal was the secret to the success of his own crops. I never took much notice – after all, he only grew “pot” plants.
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