Mom’s rape sacrifice

In an act of courage, a mother and daughter have decided to speak out about the harshest decision of their lives when facing a rapist armed with a butcher’s knife.

Malusi Sihele, 32, has since been jailed for life for the rape of Khunjulwa Mkile on January 16 last year.

A road building company owner, Mkile, 44, kept her lifelong promise to protect her teenage daughter and offered herself to Sihele instead.

Khunjulwa had promised to throw a big 21st birthday party for daughter, Lulamela, 19, if she did not fall pregnant, and in turn Lulamela had committed to keep herself “pure”.

But the rapist, Sihele – a neighbour – entered their home a year ago and shattered their dreams.

For a year Khunjulwa has bottled up the trauma and found herself unable to speak about it.

This week she said she and her daughter had agreed it would help with their healing if they told their story, and they gave permission to be identified.

They hope their decision to speak out will help other women harbouring similar emotional pain to do the same, and release their agony.

“I will never forget that day. He raped me in the full view of my daughter and threatened to kill us both if we cried out,” Khunjulwa told the Daily Dispatch.

Khunjulwa said she and Lulamela were sleeping in their home in New Rest, Viedgesville near Mthatha, when Sihele broke in with the intention of raping Lulamela.

Khunjulwa recognised him as a neighbour who had been asked at some time to fix a door, but pretended not to know him.

The mom said: “I thought of the promises I had made to Lulamela and I begged him to rape me instead.”

In an Mthatha Regional Court judgment, it was found Sihele had violently raped Khunjulwa a number of times in front of her daughter.

When he was finished, Sihele helped himself to their cellphones and R500 in cash and left, threatening to come back and hurt them again.

Khunjulwa said she had done what any mother would to protect their daughter.

“I could not let this monster rape my little angel.

“I’d rather die for my child.”

But the rape has continued to torment mother and daughter.

Lulamela praised her mother as her heroine.

“Part of me feels proud of my mom, but the other part is extremely worried about her.

“I curse that man. He is evil,” said Lulamela.

In a victim impact statement handed to the court, it was stated both the mother and daughter needed counselling as a result of the violation inflicted by Sihele.

Khunjulwa’s hero is regional court prosecutor Sipho Sintwa, who argued for the harshest sentence.

On February 10, the court sentenced Sihele to life imprisonment for the rape.

He was also sentenced to eight years in jail for housebreaking with intent to rape and 15 years for robbery, with both sentences running concurrently.

However, there will be no big 21st bash for Lulamela. She is now the mother of a baby.

Lulamela said: “I thought I would rather have someone who loves me instead of being raped. I fell pregnant the first day I made love. The rape thing affected my logical thinking and messed up our lives. I did disappoint my mother, who sacrificed herself for me,” she said.

But her mother is at peace with her daughter.

Khunjulwa said: “I don’t blame Lulamela. I love her.”

Both women said the more they spoke out about the rape the better they felt.

“I am planning to share my story with other victims so they, too, can speak out and heal,” said Khunjulwa. — lulamilef@dispatch.co.za