Men should cry, show emotions and let go of the tough boy image which results in them bottling things up.
This was said by panelists at the Carling Black Label Bold Brave Strong discussion on masculinity in Soweto on Monday.
On the panel was renowned broadcaster Robert Marawa, actor Pallace Dladla, Father a Nation (FAN) founder Craig Wilkinson, political commentator Eusebius Mckaiser and Eastern Cape-born comedian Donovan Goliath.
Marawa said: “Men lie to each other a lot as being part of masculinity. If you show some weakness then your strength is eroded because we always want to present ourselves as being strong.”
Speaking to the Daily Dispatch after the discussion, Goliath said he had suffered from depression for three years. He advised men to seek professional help.
“The first step is admitting. That got me to speak to therapists and that allowed me to get the emotions out. I was the guy who did not want to put a burden on someone else that I was suffering.
“I just needed people to think I was a good, happy person. It’s very important for men to be allowed to show emotions,” he said.
“The stigma around men is that men are very guarded and in this day and age, more than ever, we need men to start expressing emotions not just for themselves, but the people who look up to them.”
The comedian said men should also be supported when they have mental illnesses such as depression.
“The whole depression thing has been around for a long time and has come to the surface now because we have more platforms to communicate about it. It’s an important topic to talk about, to make people understand that they are not crazy or lazy, maybe they really have a problem and need help.
“That is why a lot of people retreat because in their minds they are too afraid to tell someone else they are depressed because of the lashing that they will get. And that is one of the sad things when you find out that someone died and it was because of depression while you thought they were fine all along because they did not want to show their weakness.”
Goliath’s words were echoed by Wilkinson.
“True masculinity is a beautiful gift to humanity. We have been under such fire, with the #MenAreTrash. Men are being insulted and criticised and also behaving badly, so we need to start understanding what it means to be a man. It’s about using your strength well and, we, as men need to talk because we do not talk,” he said.
Carling Black Label brand director Grant Pereira said the conversation came directly after a TV commercial on what it means to be a man which was launched in September.
“The adverts we have been releasing are about showing how men must fully connect with themselves in the new world. We believe traditional masculinity is not equipping our young men on how to deal with the world of today.
“Young men must become the changers of society by becoming bold enough to show emotions and brave enough to be great role models and strong enough to always respect women,” Pereira said...